Fear of God

I'm finally getting around to another real post. To my faithful audience, I'm sorry for the wait. My life is absolutely insane recently with much travel, visiting family, and an upcoming move to begin a new job. However, throughout all of this, I've had a little time to read and a lot of time to think so this is the first of, hopefully, a fairly regular string of posts.

As a response to my post Comfort in Islam, Azooz mentioned the importance of fear of God. To quote his exact words:

Islam does not concentrate on either God's mercy or God's love - the Fear of God must always come first.

Although I do agree that fear of God is a necessary part of one's relationship with the Judeo-Christian-Muslim God, I hate to think that fear is the primary emotion governing that relationship.

When thinking about relationships in general, relationships built on and depending on fear are the saddest kind by far. Governments that maintain control through fear and intimidation are considered evil, totalitarian forces. A man who controls his wife or children through fear or intimidation is an abuser and a criminal. These relationships founded on fear are unstable, sad, and are looked down upon by others who often try to free the victims from their oppression.

I won't go so far as to say that fear should be completely eliminated from such relationships. Children's fear of their parents is occasionally necessary to maintain order. The people's fear of police is necessary to preserve peace. However, in these cases, fear is only necessary for the extreme cases. In daily life, the relationship between parents and children is based on love, trust, and dependence. The relationship between a people and their government should, likewise, be built on trust and accountability.

I understand Azooz's assertion that fear will keep you on the straight path and help you lead a good life. However, people who live in constant fear live sad, desperate lives. Additionally, I feel like doing the right thing and living a good life as a result of respect and love is much better incentive than doing it out of fear. Although the outcome may be the same, what is in one's heart is drastically different. In the first case, one has a true desire to do what is right whereas in the second, one simply desires to avoid the punishment that goes along with what is wrong.

I'm starting to think that the biggest differences between Christianity, Judaism, and Islam are simply their perception of God; which attributes of God receive the most attention. In all three God has the same attributes but each focuses on different aspects, which influence their practices, rituals, and cultures.

I just needed to get that out because Azooz's comment has been bothering me ever since I read it. What does everyone else think?